Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Mail from "Center for the Advancement of Women" organization

When opening my email in Google, i felt touched and proud because of getting the letter from "Center for the Advancement of Women" organization, that was related with my article: "Night Worker Ladies". I appealed to the readers to support this organization.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Night Worker Ladies between pity and cost of living

I used the term "night worker ladies" for the women who worked in the business of night entertainment (pub, cafe, discotheque, night club, etc), with the task to accompany for drank the guests who came for pleasure and make them happy. Several night entertainment venues in Indonesia used the term "Purel", "Ladies", "PR" (even local or import). My friend from China say them as "bei cuo siao cie" (sorry if I typed incorrect pinyin). Their income is based on the number of hours that was gathered from accompanying their guest and money tips.

At this time I worked in one of the best night entertainment, with the position on the managerial level. I often saw several of them (night worker ladies) got reprimand from their superiors (usually called Momy) because absent. At one time, I ask to one of them who's often absent, just to know what's the problem. Our conversation was as follows (translated in English):

Me: "Why you often absent?" (for a long time she kept silent with the head bowed down).
Me: "I cares to you. That's why I talk to you".
She: "My neighbor often mock me when knowing I went out in the night. They humiliate me. Actually my aim is just to looking for money, for buy my baby's milk, because I am single-parent" (she began to cry while saying it and my feeling became touched to her. Difficult to continue the next question)"
Me: "Really I don't like the person who just critic but cannot give the way-out. Okay, I just want to give you my view, next is up to you to choose it. I will ask you a few questions and you do not have to answer it, that is:
First... I did not hope you work like this forever. Make a target as a night worker lady, perhaps for 1 year... 3 years... or...?
Second... if your baby cry because of hungry and you have no money as a mother whether your tears will goes down? Did your neighbor give you some money and care about it? Maybe parent will help you but one day they will go-forever. Your brothers also have their own family.
(She still keeps silent with tears fall down on her cheek)
Third... use your money wisely and keep the rest. After you feel enough to begin the small-scale business, stop as night worker lady and start a new life with your own effort".
She: "I have not any skill or good education (replied with an empty view). Can you give me one way-out?"
(I felt silent and said in my heart: "God, what should I tell to her?". Honest, I could not help her financially.)
Me: "Care to your parents. Give a little to the poor. Pray seriously to God and ask Him to bless you. Maybe one day He will send you a wise man who will take you from the dark cloud"
She: "I ever pray to God but no answer"
Me: "You must pray until God's mercy touching you. Pray twice, three times, 100x, 1000x...? UNTIL GOD MERCY TOUCHING YOU! Means, how deep your prayer in your soul, not the amount.
(Then she look at me with sharp gaze but I don't know what is she think about. Finally I end these discussion and let her to work again).

Next... what is your view about night worker ladies? Immoral? Social disease? or more realistic? Only a feeling of pity is not enough to ease their sufferings. Take the action, although a little (like counseling, donation, etc). They are also being in place around you!
Note: I must obscure the picture above for the privacy reason.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

An Hour with Family

At one time i found a text-file in the computer that was used
together. The file contents was as follows :
------------>
A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find
his 5-year-old son which waiting for him at the door.
Son : "Daddy, may I ask you a question"
Daddy : "Yeah sure, what it is?"
Son : "Dad, how much do you make an hour?"
Daddy : "That's none of your business, and
why do you ask such a thing?" (daddy said with angrily).
Son : "I just want to know. Please tell me,
how much do you make for an hour?"
Daddy : "I make Rs. 500 an hour"
Son : "Oh" (the little boy replied, with his head down)
Daddy : "Looking up"
Son : "Dad, may I please borrow Rs. 300?"

The father was furious, and said :
If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some
money to buy a silly toy or other nonsense, then march yourself
to your room and go to bed. Think why you are being so selfish.
I work hard everyday for such this childish behaviour.

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.
The man sat down and started getting even angrier
about the little boy's questions. He mumble :
"How dare he ask such questions only to get some money"

After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and
started to think: "May be there was something he really needed to
buy with that Rs.300. He really didn't ask for money very often!"
The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened it.
"Are you asleep, son?" he asked.
"No daddy, I'm awake," replied the boy.
"I've been thinking, may be I was too hard on you earlier",
said the man. "It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation
on you. Here's the Rs.300 you asked for".
The little boy sat straight up, smiling.
"Oh thank you dad !", he yelled, then, reaching under his pillow,
he pulled some crippled up notes.

The man, seeing that the boy already had money, started to get
angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, then
looked up at his father.
Daddy : "Why do you want money if you already had some?"
Son : "Because I didn't have enough, but now I do"
"Daddy... I have Rs. 500 now. Can I buy an hour of your time?"
"Please come home early tomorrow"
"I would like to have dinner with you"
------------>

It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life.
We should not let time slip through our fingers without having
spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close
to our hearts. If we "go" someday, the company that we are
working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But...
the family & friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest
of their lives. And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into
work than to our family. An unwise investment indeed !
Did you know what's the full word of FAMILY?
FAMILY = Father And Mother I Love You.

After finishing read that file, without being realised...
my tear goes down. This was actually experienced by me.

Chinese proverb about MONEY !

* With MONEY we can buy a house BUT NOT home-sweet-home.
* With MONEY we can buy a clock BUT NOT time.
* With MONEY we can buy a bed BUT NOT sleep-well.
* With MONEY we can buy books BUT NOT knowledge.
* With MONEY we can buy good hospitalization BUT NOT health.
* With MONEY we can buy a position BUT NOT respect.
* With MONEY we can buy blood BUT NOT life.
* With MONEY we can buy sex BUT NOT love.
As a workaholic, my heart touched & stop suddenly when read it. Start to thinking is it true money is superior than me & my family ?
I received this proverb by mail from Steven, my friend.
And now i post it to share with you
.